Desiring Him More Than Just His Answers

Waiting sometimes can just suck.  I really had considered myself a pretty patient person - until we've hit month seven of waiting.  I have to keep telling myself the average wait time is two years... but, ugh, that's a long time!  There are moments where I feel that the waiting is just a waste of time, even though we make efforts to enjoy the little things in life during this season.  A couple of weeks ago our sermon was about waiting.  God knew just what I needed to hear and I could not swipe fast enough on my phone to take notes.  One of the things the pastor talked about was desiring God more than just His answers.  That really struck a chord with me.  Too often I am just waiting for the outcomes, trying to know what the answers will be.  In reality, I should intentionally and actively pursuing Him.  As in right now.  This season.  Keep working to bloom right where I am planted, right at this moment.  I need to remember that the faith, gratitude, and trust that I have is enough and that those things will continue to keep me close to Him.       

My hope is that if anyone who is reading this is going through their own struggle with patience or waiting, that you find peace as you seek to desire Him more.     

Belated B-Day Shout Out to the Little Cousins!

So what are the chances that your cousin in Minnesota and your cousin in Colorado have a baby on the same day?  I am not sure, but it happened to me!  I will never forget January 2, 2010 - the day I bawled like a big baby getting the news I got two new little cousins on the same day!  Warms my heart still to this day thinking about it!  Love and miss you Mia and Huck!

2010

 

2013

 

2010

 

 2014

Patience

Home study is passed... and so now we wait. and wait. and wait.  Each month we get a report from our agency about our profile views.  Our profile has been shown to four different expecting mothers, and all of them "felt a stronger connection to another family" as the agency says. 

How polite of them. 

It's frustrating knowing another month has come and gone with no news.  I can't help but think if there is something different we should have done with our profile.  It's hard not questioning and analyzing every aspect of ourselves that was put into that profile.  

But for now, we are going to find the joy in our pre-baby moments.  This weekend we are going to shoot guns to prepare for our hunting expedition in Missouri and celebrate the birth of baby #2 for a good friend.   No one said you can't have fun while practicing patience!

 

Romans 12:12
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. (NIV)

More and Less

I recently finished reading a book and in it the father of two adults passed away.  In their discussing of what life would be like for them in the future with their dad gone, one replied, "Less."  That struck me so deeply as I read it and that one word best described how I've felt recently with the passing of my grandpa.  Less.  Since losing my mom at age 20 unexpectedly, I had it in my mind that no death would be as bad as that.  It's partly true, but I would have never thought losing my grandpa would have such an impact.  But the man whose blue eyes made an entire room sparkle and whose endless jokes could change your mood in a heartbeat is terribly missed.  It's not the same with him gone... But yet this world is more because of him.  The impact he'd had on others is endless and I consider myself more because of him.  So that's it for now.  Life is more and less.